ComCom

Sweeney Li

Let me paint a picture of my first academic conference for you:

It was February 2024, my PhD had just started, so naturally I had nothing to present and almost no idea what to expect. Just so happens that Etmaal was held in a venue 10-min walk away from my home that year, my supervisor encouraged me to attend: no pressure of presenting, a chance to “feel the vibes”, and very low cost of showing up.

So I went.

During the day, things were fine. I went from session to session, listened to presentations, and avoided small talk. The idea of approaching strangers felt exhausting. Running into my supervisors and chatting with them during coffee breaks felt like enough “networking” to tick the conference box at the time.

Things really went downhill from the start of the conference party. My supervisors and acquaintances were scattered across the venue, and suddenly I had no one to stand next to. I tried to join one group, but not long after I joined, the conversation just… stopped. We stood in a silent circle, and I immediately placed the blame on myself: I must be the reason for the awkwardness. I don’t have anything appropriate to say.

I excused myself and said that I would walk around, but actually, I was just standing alone in a room full of people having fun, feeling like an outsider and a failure. I went home early that day and was scared for my future conference participation.

Fast forward two years to ICA 2026 in Cape Town, the other side of the world.

I had such a great time. I caught up with familiar faces, updated each other on our projects, and picked up where we left off. I also started so many conversations with strangers simply by making eye contact, smiling, and asking how they are doing and how their conference is going. I never once felt anxious or nervous about what to say or whether what I said was “right”.

People called me “extroverted”.

So what changed during the two years? What did I do to seem “extroverted” when I’m still indeed an introvert? I hope the pointers below could help a fellow introverted peer like myself:

First, Some Expectation Management —

The first one or two conferences are almost bound to be hard. There is, of course, a contrast between everyone you observe and yourself. When everybody else seems to know people and is having fun, it’s hard not to think about whether you are doing something wrong. However, you have to remember that these are your first experiences at conferences, and it takes time for you to learn and adapt to the conference social norms, and for your network to grow.

Going to conferences and showing up is already a big step! A brief conversation about your research in February turns into “Hey, nice to see you again!” in June. Over a few conferences, the number of faces you recognize grows significantly without you noticing, and it becomes hard for you to feel alone at conferences. This is exactly what happened to me. I’m now in my third year and have attended five conferences, and my network has slowly expanded to a point where I was surprised to see how many people I recognized and how many people recognized me in ICA 2026.

Second, Dealing with Pressure…

There may be a lot of internal and external pressure for you to achieve some “networking goal” each time you go to a conference. I know I definitely experienced reactance when I encountered a detailed to-do list for “successful conference networking”.

Of course, there was very useful advice on the list, but treating networking as a task to be completed made me feel like I was forced to socialize with people. As a result, I started to overthink about the steps I needed to take for successful networking, and how I had to expand my network at conferences, otherwise it’s a waste of my time and effort. This ultimately decreased my motivation to network and made conference participation less appealing to me.

Therefore, my recommendation is not to pressure yourself into conversations for the sake of networking, but let things happen organically. If you are passionate about the field you are studying, and you encounter people working in the same field, questions and conversations emerge naturally, and network expansion follows.

Third, Try NOT to Overthink.

Speaking of overthinking, I know it’s a struggle for my fellow introverted peers, but try not to overthink what you are saying and what you have already said. Overthinking in social occasions, such as at conferences, always complicates how you approach people.

The most important thing is to be yourself and be genuinely curious about people. The more you feel comfortable in the environment, the better chance you have of having good conversations.

When you just want to start a conversation with people who were presenting, consider taking pictures of their presentation and offering to share these pictures with them during the break (especially if you notice there isn’t any coauthor taking pictures during the presentation), so that they can use them for their social media. Alternatively, ask where they are going for the next session and offer to walk them to their next session. People seldom say no to that.

Some Pratical Tips

Finally, I struggle with remembering the names and faces of people I’ve just met, so I personally find it useful to write down a few details after conversations: their name, institution, and research area, plus something that helps me recall who they are (for example, the panel we shared or the topic of their talk). At conferences, you meet so many people that it’s easy to lose track, and these notes become a big help later.

They are especially useful when you want to follow up with new contacts. If you run into someone you might want to collaborate with or visit in the future, you can use your notes to write a short email after the conference, reminding them of who you are and thanking them for the interaction you had. This kind of follow-up strengthens the connection and keeps the door open for future conversations.

All in all, the most important things are to show up, to keep your expectations low, and to take small and genuine social steps. Before you know it, you will start enjoying conferences.

The Comcom team wishes you a great summer!

Note: Photo by Jaime Lopes on Unsplash